Suddenly, the sanitized, teen emo porn that had been the "Twilight" franchise turns into a Robert Rodriguez-inspired climax rich with excitement and an emotional depth previously unseen in these films. It's content so surprising, so thrilling and so shocking that it's completely incongruous with the rest of the franchise and is, quite frankly, did-not-see-that-coming awesome. Instead, I'm going to tell you that "The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2? contains about the best 20 minutes of the entire franchise. Who knew? So she runs to Italy and tells Aro (Michael Sheen), head of the Volturi, which gives him and all of his delightfully beautiful, creepy underlings something to do - kill the Cullens! By the way, Sheen is so fantastic in this role, it's obvious he enjoys playing it. When one of the Cullens' cousins sees Renesmee floating and catching snowflakes, she assumes Edward and Bella have turned a child into a vampire and, according to vampire law, that's illegal. She can touch your cheek and make you see the truth (a potential presidential debate moderator for 2016?).
TWILIGHT BREAKING DAWN PART 2 123 MOVIE MOVIE
Renesmee is growing fast 15 minutes into the movie she's the size of an 8-year-old girl, and of course, this girl has special powers. It's now Edward and Bella forever, while Jacob will devote his life to the half-blood princess. I know what you're thinking: "EWith her new-found strength, Bella slaps Jacob around and gets some laughs in the process.Īnd with that, we have finally moved on from the bizarre love triangle that was Bella, Edward and Jacob. See, Bella had no idea that Renesmee is being protected by Jacob following that moment in the last movie when he, as a werewolf, imprinted on Renesmee. Like Kenan Thompson's character on Saturday Night Live would say, "What's up with that?" Even so, it's when Bella meets her baby that she really starts to impress. That is, until Bella meets her half-blood baby, which is a complete CGI bobble-headed freak. Besides, Bella's new attitude is so intriguing, we can forgive this kind of neglect. Awful? Yes, but, sure to please everyone who's blinded by their love for these characters. Wow, we are talking serious second-rate, high cholesterol cheese. It's Bella and Edward running through the forest as Bella hunts for blood (animal blood, of course) for the very first time. Unfortunately, this is when we experience our first of several CGI effects fails in the film. Our heroine quickly discovers she has tremendous strength and speed and incredibly keen senses, especially her ability to smell human blood. When Bella wakes up as a vampire, she's actually waking up for the very first time in her life - or in this case, afterlife. It also, thank god, killed Bella Swan the boring, whiny, lightning rod for monster love and birthed Bella Swan, the kick-ass, lightning-fast, I can-now-beat-Kellan-Lutz-at-arm-wrestling vampire. Giving birth to their demon child, Renesmee, killed Bella Swan the human but birthed Bella Swan, the vampire. When we last left Kristen Stewart's Bella Swan, her true love, Edward Cullen, had turned her into a vampire to save her life. Which brings me to "The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2?, a "Twilight" movie that is NOT BAD. In other words, it's OK to like bad movies. They usually have issues, and who among us doesn't? As for the acting: if you have a few days I can tell you all about the movies I love that feature some of the worst performances you'll ever see. So what if Bella Swan served as a poor role model? So what if the actors seemed so uncomfortable on screen you thought they might actually jump off it, run down the aisle and leave the theater? Sometimes, poor role models are the easiest to relate to. To callously belittle the "Twilight" franchise is to insult thousands of people who have truly invested their hearts and souls into a movie franchise that, in many ways, has had a very real and profound impact on their lives.
Andrew Cooper/Courtesy of Summit Entertainment
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